I felt like a failure…

1 Flares Twitter 1 Facebook 0 Pin It Share 0 Google+ 0 StumbleUpon 0 Filament.io 1 Flares ×

A little over 8 years ago, My husband and I were moving into our house. Yes, at 21, my husband and I bought a house. In a great neighborhood, with a great school district… we could totally start a family in this house. We moved in, got comfortable and started re-doing the family room since we hated the stupid wood paneling on the walls.

About 4 months into living in our new home, I lost my job. I don’t want to go into details about that but let’s just say I felt like I was being pushed out. Because we were 21 and felt like we were on top of the world, we had no financial plan for this happening. No savings to help us stay a float while I looked for another job. Not to mention, the mortgage was a little more than we should have signed on for. I was only without a job for 2 months (and still here!) but didn’t have a paycheck coming in for almost 3 months. As a result, we almost lost our cars and were behind on our house payments.

It took us way too long to realize that we needed to do something or risk losing everything we had worked hard for. Because our house payment was more than it should have been, we couldn’t catch up. So we had to make a decision: Sell the house that we wanted or risk losing everything because we didn’t want to leave.

In the end, we sold the house. After living there a year, we packed up our belongings and moved in with our mother-in-law for a couple of months before searching for an apartment. While living with her, we helped out around the house with bills but ultumately worked on catching up on our personal bills before signing another lease. I felt like a failure, like the one thing we should have been able to do, we couldn’t. Its funny, looking back on how much our house payment was, we pay $100 less in rent right now then our mortgage was back then. If we would have waited another year or so.. would we still own our house? I’m not sure.

We have been tossing around the idea of buying another house. After paying rent for the past 7 years, we want something to call our own.. something that we can remodel and something that we could add another “little one” in. I think there are a couple things that we need to do before jumping into that but first, I need to get over my fear.. the fear that we’ll end up exactly where we were before.



  1. says

    Your situation is not uncommon and it doesn’t, by any means make you a failure. You did what was in the best interest of your family and you started. That takes a lot of courage. Just be grateful you learned those lessons earlier in life. You have plenty of time to get to where you want to be!

  2. says

    well, that seems like guilt and you dont need to carry that sround anymore- right now interest rates are the lowest they have ever been so with good credit and jobs that you have had longer than a year, there is a great chance you can be a homeowner= go for it! dont let that past fear hold you back!